Attending to the little things makes a lot of difference. I called the customer service number of my new health insurance plan with a specific question about coverage that was unclear in the booklet I had received. The customer service representative who answered my call was very abrupt, hardly seemed to listen to my question, and her tone of voice was harsh. I persisted in trying to clarify my question for her so that I could get an answer but I was unfailingly polite, met every one of her abrupt responses with a kind reply, not giving up on trying to get the information I wanted, but always gently and respectfully. By the end of the call we were talking like best friends with her telling me that she would investigate the problem further and let me know if she discovered anything more and if I found anything out about the problem would I please call her and let her know. Sometimes you can see the effect of small kindness almost immediately plus it feels so much better to not get hooked into angry reactivity however the response is received.